JENNIFER THANGAVELU
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I believe that authenticity matters; hiding who we are stifles growth opportunities for the individual and collective. So in this blog I write about all things that genuinely fascinate me: art, spirituality, the puzzles of personhood--and their ongoing interplay. For some, learning the artist's thoughts contaminates the experience of the art, and I respect that. It might be best to avoid this blog and visit only my gallery pages. Personally I can't get enough of the stories, ideas, and people behind art, so this blog is most appropriate for an audience similarly curious and open-minded, and who won't take offense at challenging perspectives and taboo topics. It's especially for those who are aware they're undergoing a spiritual awakening and seek to feel less alone in that process. I wouldn't be at this better place in my life if it weren't for the wayshowers I found online who helped me understand what was happening to me and to the world, and I hope to pay it forward by doing the same for others on the awakening path. But most of all this blog is for me, as writing helps me clarify my thoughts and record my progress like nothing else. 

A Bone of Contention in the Archangel's Command

4/4/2020

 
sacrum
a birthplace of blood, sure
but something more
hosting vestigial tail, incipient wings
animal and angel in one
the bony locus
of where we're from
and where we'll go
Picture
Image credit: Dr. Johannes Sobotta - Sobotta Atlas and Text-book of Human Anatomy 1909, Public Domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=29333524
sacrum
stone chrysalis 
where dual serpents sleep
awaiting their snaking awakening
up the spine
but this butterfly? ossified
kundalini's flight grounded
​(still)

the appointed too disjointed

sacrum
sacred fulcrum 
on which much hinges
when uncertain seat for the soul
a pivot into pathologies of skeletal jenga:
sway backed knock kneed pigeon toed fallen arched
the twisted sister
marionette strung
​(strangle-hung)

from The Matrix

sacrum
silicate sack
casting crumbs in my wanderings:
iliopsoas tendinitis, femoral anteversion,
coxa valga, sacroiliac joint dysfunction 
the maunderings of modern medicine 
too Newtonian to note true origin: 
these? these are empath's bones
shrugged the shaman
(soul contract trauma: it's how I keep my ghoulish figure)

sacrum
samsaric seashell held to ear of dantian
fielding echoes of wounds legion
of light doused again
and again
and again
and again
and the strum of psoas (ham)strung
spine to femur in pelvic guitar
pulled too tight, pitch too high
the song  of fight or flight
(or freeze and fawn)

a familiar dispiriting...

Mu scar?
Atlantis sadness?
I can feel it in my
bones
of the story 
whose denouement starts
at yawning dawn 
of Aquarius
and so:
a gift from Elohim
gleaming spessartine
placed in sacrum's shield,
brittle from battle,
graffitied with glyph
this firestone burns with:

​It's time now, warrior, because you learned
words broke your bones, like sticks and stones
excavate shadow so crutch becomes sword 
pull sword from your bones, scattered like stones
your lightsaber-Excalibur calibrates
to the math of the New Earth
where blood from a stone is order of the day
you'll stand straighter now
marrow, kitchen sponge no more,
one
infinitely chambered crucible 

fo(u)r the alchemy you came here fo(u)r

- Jennifer Thangavelu

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